Just hours away now from the first day of school. I literally spent the summer getting ready. I cleaned, organized, thought through curriculum, painted a giant tree in the hallway (what do you mean I was supposed to get permission first???), inadvertently stole furniture from the 5/6 grade teacher, and tried to think through every detail of the first day. I made lists by the dozens, revised them, discarded some, carefully crossed off finished items and worked feverishly to prioritize the most important ones. I didn’t get EVERYTHING done I had hoped to, but I came pretty darn close.
And I am READY!
I’m almost as excited as the night before my own first grade first day. My best friend and cousin, Sharlene, and I had matching outfits our mother had purchased for us. I had new notebooks and a Charlie Brown lunchbox, and Mrs. Price was there to greet me with a smile and the most calm, soothing personality I have ever encountered. Nothing rattled that saint. Trust me when I say, I got into trouble plenty that year (for talking, mostly. OK, fine! It was always for talking…happy?). I spent a large portion of my first grade experience facing the chalkboard. I can still smell the chalk dust. But somehow, I do not remember her ever being angry with me. She meted out punishment so sweetly that I had to resist the urge to thank her for it.
I LOVED first grade.
I don’t think I’ll sleep a wink tonight. I can’t wait to see those little faces with enormous smiles come hesitantly through the door. They’ll be shy, a little intimidated, and spotless in their new school clothes. I will greet them with gusto and pull them into my orbit as quickly as I possibly can. Their mothers (and maybe a father or two), will get the grand tour and be treated to muffins and juice (no, not homemade… don’t think TOO highly of me).
Then when parents are gone and the bell has rung, we will launch into all The Firsts. The first morning snack, the first time (of seven gazillion this year) that we will sing and march with the Good Morning Song, the first lunch and recess, the first opening of their crisp new workbooks, and the first bus ride back home (followed by the first collapsing of Mrs. Dahl into a chair).
Here on the eve of a new year, I can’t help but wonder what this school year will hold for us. I do this same maze of questioning every New Year at the stroke of midnight. I wonder what the coming year will hold for me and for those I love. Will we know prosperity, health, and peace? Or will troubled waters touch us and forever alter our lives? Maybe its just my way of preparing myself for potential heartache. Maybe. Or maybe it’s my way of mentally documenting our place in Life’s Journey each year. Maybe it’s a little of both.
So as I think about the school year, I wonder… Will my students be enthused about learning? Will they struggle? Will any of them know sorrow for the first time in their young lives? Will divorce touch their universe? Will a new sibling be added? Will I be the competent and professional teacher I hope to be? Will they learn everything they need to learn to be successful in second grade? What will their lasting impressions of first grade be when they are middle-aged men and women reminiscing as I am now? I doubt I can live up to saint status, but maybe I can at least provide a safe harbor in their young lives. And just maybe they will learn a thing or two in the process.
The biggest question before me is, will they take the first step towards becoming lifelong learners? I fervently hope so!! I have such dreams and high hopes for them. Maybe my perspective is too rosy and maybe I’m reaching too high. I don’t know…. I just want them to fall in love with the CONCEPT of learning. They can be anything they want to be in life, if they will make learning their companion. Even now, it’s such a heady experience for me to learn new things. How do I best transfer that enthusiasm and love to them?
It is a very daunting task I have before me. First grade is pivotal. Vista Printing made “free” business cards for me. On the backside I am quoted as saying something like, “First grade is the foundational step towards lifelong learning,” or something to that effect. True, no?
SO… the question on the floor is, am I up to the challenge? The honest answer is, I don’t know. Only time will tell. I believe with all my heart that I am, but that faith in myself must be confirmed in a variety of ways and over a period of time. Only the finished product at the end of the school year will bear testimony to my competency. And yes, I have one semester of teaching under my belt, but those first graders had the benefit of a different teacher for the first half of last year. This will be the first time I alone will be responsible for their learning.
And so, as I lay my questioning head down on the pillow tonight, full of hopes and ideals, I will patiently wait for morning light to prod me into my first day of full-year teaching. This is what I trained for, prayed for, paid for, and dreamed of for years, really. It all comes down to now.
God,
Fill me with wisdom beyond my limited self, patience above my resources, and love outside human capacity. Let me guide, nourish, and cherish each child as my own. And may learning simply become the outflow of an environment rich in opportunity. Thank you for bringing me to this place and setting me on this incredible journey. My gratitude is without words.
Amen.
Bring it on, First Day!
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